Our emotional state in a given moment may influence the way we see a particular situation which impacts our behaviour. “Perception moulds, shapes, and influences our experience of our reality,” says Linda Humphreys PhD, a psychologist and life, relationship, and spirituality coach. “Perception is merely a lens or mindset from which we view people, events, and things.” our perceptions influence all areas of life. “The totality of your perceptions— about yourself, your life, others, and so on—creates and impacts your personal reality and ultimately our experience of life. Everyone knows the feeling of anger. The feeling we feel when someone cuts us off on the highway or when we feel disrespected by our boss. The instinctive, natural way to express anger is to respond aggressively.
Anger is a natural, adaptive response to threats ; it inspires powerful, often aggressive, feelings and behaviours, which allow us to fight and to defend ourselves when we are attacked. A certain amount of anger, therefore, is necessary to our survival. On the other hand, we can’t physically lash out at every person or object that irritates or annoys us; laws, social norms, place limits on how far our anger can take us. Anger, like all emotions, should be monitored with self-awareness. This can prevent it from spiralling into hostile, aggressive, or violent behaviour toward others or oneself. Here are a few ways to effectively deal with anger. Expressing your angry feelings in an assertive—not aggressive—manner is the healthiest way to express anger. To do this, you must learn how to make clear what your needs are, and how to get them met, without hurting others. Being assertive does not mean being pushy or demanding; it means being respectful of yourself and others. When you are triggered remember to activate your pause button.
Whenever you feel triggered by something or someone, take a moment to breathe and ground yourself into the present moment so you can choose how you will respond from a more empowered place. And if a few deep breaths aren’t enough to help you shift, don’t be afraid to give yourself a grown-up time out so you can come back calmer and address the issue effectively. When we are triggered, it is also important to have a willingness to see things differently so that we can get a fresh perspective of the situation and respond accordingly. Often when we re triggered we tend to assign meanings and causes that might actually not be true. At times we are so accustomed to perceiving things a certain way that sometimes it’s difficult to see our blind spots and where perhaps we’re not looking at things in the most favourable light.
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