“The Most Important Things are the Connections You Make With Others” Tom Ford
Authentic connections make us feel seen, heard, and recognised. They help us to feel anchored and connected to a part of something bigger than ourselves. Believe it or not, science has proven that we all have an innate need for human connection and affection.
Finding authentic friendships can be challenging, especially in adult life. Having moved in and out of the UK four times with a total of ten house moves in the past twelve years (whilst having had three children)I can say I’ve experienced a lot of change and met a variety of people.
Even though life is full, my value for connection and friendship has never faded. I have met people who I have deeply connected with, and also the opposite. Has anyone else experienced this?
I feel truly grateful for the lessons and inner growth as it’s helped me to cultivate community and connection that leaves my heart feeling full
Today, I share with you a few things that I do that help me discern and connect in a way that is authentic to me. Enjoy the tips!
Click here to listen to my podcast on authentic friendships
Pay attention to how your body feels after you have interacted with someone. Do I feel heavy or light? Self-conscious or empowered? Do you feel that you have the space to be who you are without judgement?
Listen without motive. Listen, and hear the person talk without thinking of what’s next. Stay present and listen to understand the depth of someone’s perspective. After reflecting, see if you are aligned from a values perspective and how that makes you feel.
Put aside the judgment. Keep an open mind. If you find yourself often judging situations and people, you are closing your door to authentic connections. If you feel judged trust your instinct and take a step back.
Allow yourself to be vulnerable. Vulnerability is a must in our close relationships. It’s how we form trust. If you want people to be open and honest with you, then you have to be open and honest with them. Being vulnerable is the new strong. Ask yourself if you feel safe enough to be open.
This will be telling.